Day 11 – DARKNESS TO LIGHT

Have you ever heard someone say “If you only knew what I was thinking…”Many of us are quick to say that we don’t know what another is thinking and later or even in the same breath, we sum up a persons whole life based on one point that we engaged in with them. Most people have a dying need to be right, as right only exists in our created bubble of existence inside our minds, that we give life to as if it was a physical glass of water that when we drink it, we are refreshed and hydrated.

The same goes with all of our creations as well. Now playing across America and the world are seemingly random murders by shooting or stabbing etc., and everyone is pretending to be caring individuals based on who dies in a specific tragedy. What is amazing and fucked up simultaneously, is that people claim that they don’t understand what is going on and how people can do such evil crimes. What we see and hate so much is the reflection of ourselves and the projected anger towards these “EVIL” people because we know we never stood up to investigate the policies in our own countries that we knew were only in place to feed the wealth of the rich while taking from the masses. The USA has implemented many policies and laws that support abuse of certain people such as slavery, banking, credit, interest rates, women not allowed to vote, imminent domain, and the list goes on. We have always had complaints but because we are a “FREE” country, we accepted these policies as the norm and as long as we were comfortable and had a little money, fuck everyone else who got the shit deals of the system.  When we allow ourselves to participate in a system that does not support everyone equally, we are not understanding that what is allowed to harm one, is allowed to harm all including self. These atrocities that we are facing is the result of all of us allowing this system to exist and closing our eyes to it to not see, and turning our heads and covering our ears to not hear, and moving to the quietest places we could find to not have to engage what we know is fucked up in hope that it will disappear from our personal reality and world. Everything we have tried to avoid, ignore, sweep away, condemn, judge, and what we “FEAR” is quickly making haste to visit us! We will either all eventually enjoy a system that supports every living thing equally, or we will all eventually despise a system that we all suffer within.

12/21/2012???? What the fuck about it? Does it mark the date when humanity will wake the fuck up and stop the bullshit with how we treat each other, to creating a new world where all have the freedom to live and express life equally without “FEAR”?… Or does it mark the date when humanity has crossed the point of no return to only plunge to the utter depths of insanity, hate, fear, and abuse? We choose!

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Day 7 – HOW MANY REALITIES

Whenever we have a chance to sit and consider what is going on in our surroundings and within ourselves, if we look honestly, we will see the inconsistencies and fluctuations in our life experience. I understand things change all the time but from the perspective of my experience of myself is what I am referring to. Of all the thoughts and memories that float in our heads daily, which ones do we grab and get personal with? Am I realizing when I pick out a thought to run with it? Do I know how many times a day that I do this shit? I can be so deep into a self created fantasy or backchat that I lose myself in it before I realize I am lost in my mind. How many realities have I created in the space of time that I existed completely within the mind. To become aware of when and what we create would assist us to understand how the mind works. Once we are aware of how the mind works, we can direct ourselves within the principle of “Do unto others as you would have done to you”, which would become what is best for all.

What is amazing, is that with every plan, every plot, every war, every crusade, every pilgrimage, every retreat, we have only created dimensional shifts and have not changed this physical reality into a place where all have dignity, and live without fear. What on this planet is it going to take for humanity to look at itself and see where we are headed and take responsibility for it! If our gods and sages and gurus have not been able to stop the atrocities over eons of time, who would think they could suddenly do it now! What level of calamity and death and destruction and disease have to arrive to get the attention of those that have the power and resources to change the world. How many realities will be created in our minds before we realize the only relevant reality is being destroyed. Humankind is like a suicidal maniac wanting to prove that he can blow him/herself into many pieces.

Day 6 – Human Reactor

Today was a calm day, cool but sunny, and after reading blogs etc. My fiance and I went for a brief walk to hang out in the sun a little bit to balance being in and out. We sat at a park near City College, then slowly made our way back home. As I rested, my fiance was using the computer, when she suddenly went out into hallway for a second, then came back in yelling to me call the Fire Dept… I did so and as I am speaking to 911, my fiance heads out to stairs while I put on jeans and sandals and head out. The smoke on floors 4, 3, and 2 was so thick, visibility and oxygen was zero at one point, and I notice a blaze coming through the trash chute on 1st fl. I was barely able to talk on phone with 911, until finally getting out the building. As we stand outside with other people and at least 3 ladder engines, they went inside to tame the blaze.

People in the bldg talk about a guy on 6th fl who traffics drugs and suspected one of his clients put something in the trash chute. Now I am becoming quite furious and reacting with anger that I was willing to go to this person and physically make him want to quit dealing myself. I see kids that were inside and women on fire escapes with their kids, and wonder if it was done purposely or accident, but I knew it could have been a lot more serious.

Tragedy affects any and everyone at times but the question is “Who am I within the tragedy?”

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see/realize/understand that life is not guaranteed within this current system where money is the external manifestation of the internal interest of the mind.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see/realize/understand that because I am here, I am a part of all that exist, the good and bad within this accepted system of polarity that I participate in.

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to judge the guy above us, when I also participate in separation from the physical as only an energetic experience called a personality, also disregarding life as I look to support only my own self interest through my survival.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize, that my internal instinct to survive is based in keeping consciousness as myself alive to continue to use up the physical to sustain itself infinitely.

I commit myself to understand who I am as consciousness within this system, and realize how I create the system constantly within my participation in the mind.

I commit myself to realize that good or bad people are only my perspective based on my own pre-programmed set of rules within a system of polarity that does not in fact support life as equal and one.

I commit myself to realize and understand that my instinct to survive is a desire of the mind as me to continue my existence as a personality and no actually interest in supporting life as what is best for all in the physical.

Day 3 – WHO AM I?

Tomorrow is not here yet and yesterday doesn’t exist. This moment here exist and I am here, but am I HERE? My question to myself, a simple one but a most important question, and even more important is my self honest answer to myself. What is my experience of myself right now, am I aware of what I think, feel, speak, how I react? These are questions that if I ask myself daily, I may learn who I am in this world and I will see it through my awareness of how I live and correspond to other people, things, animals, nature. The real question is who am I as “FEAR”? I exist as a liquified manifestation of “FEAR” layered with each layer being the basis of the layer above it. This is my equation of myself: if I am as all as one as equal here, then as I understand who I am, I will understand who everyone is and the reason for the conditions of the world which are all man-made, and can only be corrected by man. No god can do it, and it will not just work it’s way out. Any belief in any type of deity will guarantee that no responsibility for this earth or the inhabitants will be undertaken by man.

JUSTIFICATION = SABATOGE = FEAR – Day 1

At first when I saw the blogs on the Journey to Life being posted, I considered it is part of an assignment that I have not reached in DIP… When I learned that it was not part of an assignment, I didn’t understand exactly the context of what it is that everyone is writing about whether a daily blog or writing specific scenarios etc. The real point is, I did not participate out of fear, and made excuses within myself that I don’t have time, and there is a lot going on in my life, my back hurts, I’ll do it one day, and the list goes on! Well today through support from Maya, I begin my journey to life, in order to walk out of the suicidal fear based constructs I hold on to that is like holding TNT just waiting for it to go off in my hands. Everything decision I have made in my life have likely been fear based, and every time I did not act on what I knew was best for all in that instant, was because of my allowance of fear to be the directive point instead of me myself. I realize that regardless of what I write or say, that if I am not working toward becoming equal with my words, it has no impact and I will not change. So today I am making a statement that I will work towards bringing everything in my life to a point of equality as what I understand is best for all, and realizing that it is not just me as myself but me as all beings here.

Living in the United States, we learn how nothing is UNITED and we exist in a STATE of separation that people in other countries just shake their heads. Everything here is compromised and what I see in this country is also what I see in myself. As money determines one’s status here, I am within myself doing the same thing, “no money = insignificant” and this is one of my justifications, and feeling bad about myself and judging myself… all in all just fucking with myself to not take responsibility for me, but blame my circumstances and the cards I’m holding for my experience in life.

Trading Places – Limited Time Only

Some of us are extremely comfortable with our lives… others are ok but could be better… and there are yet those who wish they could wake up from this nightmare, but no alarm sounds off! I have met people who can talk about money for hours, and what they are doing and who they work with etc. I have heard others who can talk about their diabetes medicine, or how many doctors visits they make, and how high gas, food, housing is, etc. Why is this? What determines how we occupy our time? Most people we meet are either secretly wishing to be rich or are actually openly trying to make the next dollar. I have heard many wealthy people say that poor people are lazy and don’t want to work and just make babies and don’t educate themselves etc. The list goes on, and people ask why should everyone have equal money and equal opportunity, and all that…

It doesn’t take much to ignore what goes on in this world when we feel secure in our expensive homes in gated communities, and suburban wealthy neighborhoods. If we don’t see it then it doesn’t matter to us… If a child is hit by a car and a private ambulance comes to get the person who was driving and leaves the child to die, then releases the person later with no injuries, shows that money as it exists now is more than life! Firefighters watch many homes burn because of the lack of insurance, or maybe the water is so expensive they cant waste it on an uninsured home… are we serious?

What if there was a trade off… every wealthy person who doesn’t consider people who are starving and have barely enough to survive, and who are abused by the system we created, and who support legislation that serves the interest of the rich, disregarding the poor… to trade places with your counterparts in poor places and 3rd world countries and in America for one week to experience what these people live with day to day! I hear the egos that shit out of the mouth of some people who say the poor want to be poor and they are dumb and lazy! We could place you in the body one of these people to see if your knowledge and arrogance is enough to improve your scenario… and there will be no food today so just imagine being full and you should be okay! If your legs are too weak to walk, you can crawl to the nearest mud hole for a drink of contaminated water, and after you puke all of your liquids out you probably would like to sleep for a minute before you try crawling to the next hole as dehydration is harsh. How many of these people would be able to make it? There is a high probability that many of us will face similar scenarios in the future because we refuse to support all as one as equal because we don’t want to let go of ego.

This is why we need a new system that supports everyone equally! No poor people = all rich people = everyone supported = what is best for all = a new world = LIFE!

GOD DIES 2012 – no FUNERAL

Have you ever sat and wondered why things are the way they are? What about your own life that you compare to another, whether your glad you are not them or wish you were them? For the rich people, god has dealt you a good hand in life and I am sure you are glad about that. For the poor person, god has dealt you a weak hand in life and I am sure you are not glad about that! Is it random when it comes to who is born into money? Is is predestined who is born with little or no resources to live a dignified life? If you thank god for giving you the good in life which is money, should those who have little or nothing also thank god that they are fucked until they die? I mean god did give you this life because you didn’t choose it, right? Or did you choose the life you have? For those who want to be more like god and please him more, you have to learn how to do things as he does! Of your children, pick one that you will feed and clothe and be gentle with and support… Then choose another one and put them outside, and make sure the one in the house cannot assist him. Give the chosen child your attention and if he wants to eat, feed him even if he is not hungry! If he complains of the slightest ailment, rush to him/her and let them know you care and are only a call away! For the other child, ignore him/her and let them stay outside when it rains and is cold because you have a purpose for them but don’t tell them what it is! It is god’s “LOVE” that comforts the chosen one, and it is god’s “TOUGH LOVE” that does absolutely nothing for the outcast! Once you become like god, you can lift your head high with pride and say “I am righteous and chosen by the most high…”, Now it will be easy to walk over poor and starving, desolate people because as god ignores them, you can ignore them and feel great because you have treasures waiting for you in heaven!

Now, for anyone who wants to defend their “invisible hope”, Who decides when, how, where, and what condition a child is born in? When crimes against humanity are done, even crimes against animals… society punishes us with jail time and/or fines and in certain cases death! So why is god floating around in the minds, and hearts of people, when the worst crimes against humanity are the utter desolation of entire countries, by holy wars, and righteous genocide! There are unspeakable crimes committed everyday that takes a persons life, dignity, food, family, home, money, and what ever can be taken! God goes on trial tonight and there will be no hung jury, as what exist in this world is more than sickening. It is abomination to life! As long as god lives in the minds of humankind, people, animals, plants will die at the hands of god void of justice! Just-Ice, a cold death so that profit reigns, and we continue living in SPITE! God always justifies himself no matter how fucked up his actions are, thus humankind created in the image and likeness of god because we do the same shit! There was a fire in heaven and only the stairway survived… To save money, instead of rebuilding heaven, it was allowed to continue burning and just renamed as HELL! Bet religion will never tell us that will they! Self responsibility, self forgiveness, self honesty, is the way to bury god forever, and created a new liveable world for every being in existence equal and one!

One day decepticons found megatron and raised him from the water then revived him… We must make sure god doesn’t have the same luck so no fucking funeral!