After relocating back to New York, we experienced challenges with our living arrangements, friends, and life in general. One week and a storm arrives, and the result is extensive damage, and loss for many here and in the tri-state area. We did not experience any outages or flooding, only high winds. As for myself, I now face a minor surgical procedure to be able to function to a level to support myself together with my fiance (an RN), as we look for work and get settled in our own place. The city is in a state of emergency and is going to take a while to resolve the issues of displacement, health, and the new comers to poverty. I am not sure what my physical body is telling me but it seems to have to do with self support. Many years I have over worked my physical body with stressful jobs, including military, and driving across the U.S., and I would say that this stress have only contributed to a part of my physical condition, but I am sure that my participation within and as the MIND is the major cause. I ask myself “Who am I within all that is happening?” I have had some fear about living arrangements but I never stopped searching and physically working at getting settled. I realize that most of what we experience as humans is created based on how we live and treat each other. This storm is not evil, but it shows man how man have designed society based on self interest and money distribution, which promotes poverty and abuse.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to exist within a self-created bubble of thoughts, fears, emotions, feelings, that only contribute to sustaining the mind as personalities which does not support the physical as life.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to through my existence within this self-created bubble, to believe that my experience as thoughts, fear, emotions, feelings, are real and need my participation.
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that my participation withing the mind, as thoughts, fears, memories, emotions, feelings, do not support me within and as the physical to live here practically in ways that support what is best for all one and equal.
I commit myself to work at living here within an as my physical body as within the purpose of finding ways to support myself to live as what is best for all as me.
I commit myself to stop my participation within and as thoughts, fears, emotions, feelings, memories, through focusing on myself as the physical breath as I go about my day.
I commit myself to become aware of my body and mind, so I will understand when I am in the mind creating personalities and dimensions, and be able to stop myself and bring myself back to the realization of self withing the physical.